novel

Picking up where I left off yesterday…I had just moved into my new house with my husband-to-be. House in Hampden, check! After graduating with a Master in Public Administration a year earlier, I had started working at a small nonprofit. It was a great job with super hours and the office was within walking distance of our home. But, I still felt restless and apathetic about my career path.

To figure out what was missing, I started doing the following:

1. Visiting breathe books on a regular basis and buying books about manifesting your dreams and connecting with your true self.

2. Writing on a weekly basis about my “dream” life– what would it look like in 3 months? 6 months? 1 year?

3. Exploring yoga by volunteering at Baltimore Yoga Village and talking openly about my yoga aspirations with teachers at the studio.

4. Writing for a Smart Woman magazine and continuing to write my first novel.

5. Talking with friends and family about my hopes for the future. Note: I did not discuss these things with anyone who would be negative. It’s important to protect yourself from dream-squashers.

It became clear that I wanted to work for myself, write, and explore yoga and spirituality on a deeper level. Even though we had just bought a house and were about to get married (not a lot of savings!), I wanted to quit my job. I felt guilty and irresponsible for these desires, but at the end of the day, I didn’t want to have regrets. Luckily, my husband was very supportive and knew how much this shift meant to me. So, I enrolled in teacher training at the Sivananda Yoga Ashram in Woodbourne, NY, quit my job, and left town one month after getting hitched!

To make a long story short, the teacher training was the perfect opportunity for me to ease into the changes I wanted to make in my life. It wasn’t the yoga paradise you might be envisioning (think: sleeping in a bunk bed, sharing a room with three other women, getting up everyone morning at 5:30AM, and having zero privacy), but it was also a beautiful experience (think: satsang and meditation, four hours of yoga per day, living in the Catskill Mountains, making wonderful friends, and nourishing your soul for an entire month). I learned a lot, but this was just the beginning.

Once I was settled into life in Baltimore as a yoga teacher and freelance writer, I realized that something was still missing. I loved working from home and making my own schedule, but I still wasn’t fulfilled in my work. It was around this time that I saw Kris Carr’s documentary, Crazy Sexy Cancer on TLC. I knew at that moment that I wanted to work for her. I researched her online and kept up with her blog and wellness forum. This was in the fall/winter of 2007.

Here’s what I did to put the rest of the pieces together:

1. I created a vision board. I remember sitting on the floor with magazines, glue, and a poster board, not knowing what I wanted to create in my life, but feeling that it couldn’t hurt to try this out! Kris was at the center of my board (picture included in Kris’ blog about vision boards).

2. I meditated daily and said affirmations. I would say, “I am happy and grateful to work for Kris Carr.” and  “I am happy and grateful that my career focuses on bringing wellness into the world.”

3. I didn’t give up or let anyone tell me my dreams were silly. Looking back, it was a long shot. How could I work for this woman who didn’t even know me and wasn’t looking for an employee?!

4. I wrote in this blog about my wellness journey and what I had learned from Kris.

In spring 2008, Kris found my blog. I jumped up and down when I read her encouraging comment. Then, I printed out her comment and tacked it on the wall above my computer. A few weeks later, while cleaning the house, I had thought. Kris had blogged about her hopes for her growing community–retreats, wellness posses around the world, starter kits, and the list goes on. A light bulb went off in my head and I sent her an email listing my ideas. I didn’t have her email address, so I sent her a message through her online community. Ding! A few minutes later she replied. Call me, she wrote. Call her? Me call Kris Carr?! I didn’t give myself the time to get nervous and just dialed the number. We hit it off on the phone and two weeks later, I jumped on a train to meet her in NYC. Note: I was flying by the seat of my pants. There were no promises of a job, no guarantees, but it just felt right in my gut.

My trip to NYC was filled with exciting conversations, brainstorm sessions, and endless possibilities. On the train ride home, I wrote my affirmations and continued to believe that everything would work out. And in a nutshell, it did. Over the past two years, I’ve worked for Kris and her super-husband and business partner, Brian. We’ve been through ups and downs, and buckets of laughs and adventures. I continue to learn from them every day.

When crafting your dreams, flexibility is important. Today might not look like I had envisioned it to be two years ago, but I’m happier and more fulfilled than I could have ever imagined. If I hadn’t grown, changed, and adapted since writing my affirmations that day on the train ride home from NYC, I’d be stuck in yesterday’s hopes. Kris often talks about her vision board being a living thing and I’m a true believer in that.

Later this week: More about the writing part of my journey in the final installment of “How I Got Here.”

In case you missed it, read Part 1 & Part 3

Tagged as: baltimore, bookstore, career, dreams, Hampden, Kris Carr, manifesting, novel, spirituality, Steve, traveling, vision board, woodstock, Writing & Editing, Yoga

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